Nail Polish

Nina declares that nail polish should be light or dark and nothing in between. Despite loving many of the colours on offer by Esse, OPI, China Glaze, Zoya and Chanel, I think I have to completely agree with her.

I think that the colour of I’m Not Really A Waitress is beautiful, but do I wear it?

I must be a bit of a slow learner, because it’s taken me this long to realise that just because I love something doesn’t mean I have to own it or that I have to adorn myself with it. It’s certainly nice to do so, but it’s not essential. I can admire another woman’s jewellery without wanting it for myself. I can admire a shade of lipstick or nail polish without needing to own it. 

So, I stick with my Chanel Rouge Noir and Blue Satin, my Zoya Freja and my China Glaze Camisole. And I use them, and they look great, and I am happy with that.

This doesn’t stop me salivating over the newest OPI minis collection, mind, but it does mean that all I have to do is wipe up the drool (safety first!) and then I can move on.

Motorcycle Jacket

I’m hoping that Nina is referring to a motorcycle-style jacket, because unless you’re actually travelling by motorcycle, you probably shouldn’t be wearing a motorcycle jacket. 

Do you really want to be asked, “So, what do you ride?”, if you don’t? 

Awkward.

Besides which, many actual motorcycle jackets are not leather, but super-tough fabric sometimes reinforced with Kevlar,  which functions really well but doesn’t look cool at all. There are even Kevlar-reinforced jeans for riders who would like to keep their kneecaps. Dress for the fall, not the ride, people :-P

Regarding motorcycle-style jackets, I’m not so fussed. Motorcycle jacket styling is one thing, but many of the jackets out there are almost mock-motorcycle jackets, and therefore reek of dagdom.  There’s nothing wrong with a road-life reference, but there’s no need to go the full Hell’s Angel if you’re going to ride your scooter to the corner espresso bar.

Authenticity is essential. If the clothes are authentic, and authentically you, you’ll probably look fine. If you have dreadlocks and like patchouli and incense, then a pair of loose woven hemp cargos is (probably) going to look alright. If you have false dreads and you hate incense and you’re wearing poly-cotton hempy-looking cargos, you’ll probably look rubbish.

Do or don’t do. There is no try.

(Anyway, I prefer the Alexander Wang style of leather jacket – suede, fabric, stretchy, soft and relaxed).

Monogrammed Stationery

Meh.

I think if you move in wide, changing social circles, and these circles are a part of your profession, monogrammed stationery might be a must-have. However, in my profession, such things are not necessary. Nice, but not necessary. Nice, but amusingly retro. Not the impression one needs to make in IT. And when the motherly amongst in your circles are into scrapbooking, Facebooking and brunch bookings, bemusing evidence of too much spare cash.  The fatherly in your circles will wonder if you are going to make them start wearing cravats. And the more diseased in your circle are going to rub their thumbs over your linen personal card and wonder if it would make a good filter. 

Monogrammed stationery doesn’t make my one hundred. I don’t know that anything really takes its place. Maybe a monogrammed phone casing?

MLBB Lipstick

This one isn’t in Nina’s One Hundred, but it is essential and it can be very hard to find.

The perfect My-Lips-But-Better lipstick doesn’t make your lips look paler or more dramatic or darker or anything else, but just that much better and maybe a bit brighter and healthier.

A MLBB lipstick is not necessarily a “nude”. I have yet to find a good “nude” lipstick, primarily because all of them have so far looked chalky on me. Nars’ Napoli, for instance, is too light on me; it promises lightness and brightness in the tube, but transforms into an apricoty shade of blah once it reaches my face. MLBW, much worse.

Nars’ Dolce Vita (described as “sheer dusty rose”), Becca’s Vendela (“rosy nude”) and Revlon’s “Rosy Nude” lipstick (yes, I see a pattern forming, too) are my current favourite MLBB lip colours. I am going to buy many, many tubes of these. Due to their perfection, they are bound to be Discontinued (at least, that’s my theory).

Missoni Knit

Nina extols the many virtues of Missoni knits, primarily their beauty and timeless art. I like their glowing colours, comfort and drape, but I wince at their frequent 70s echo. I have seen a simple pale Missoni knit on Net-A-Porter which I think is the ideal summer holiday item, but I’ve not yet had a burning need for something like that.

I have to admit, I’d be terrified of getting the knit caught on something. And summer holidays can involve travel, and travel can be rough on body and wardrobe. Yes, once again, when faced with the glory of knit and fashion perfection, all this hairshirt can think of is, “Will I wreck it travelling on the train?” Sorry. I can’t help myself. I’ve ruined so many items of clothing one way or the other that the thought of risking damage to such a beautiful thing makes me cower inwardly.